We have no idea what’s going on – spring fever perhaps?
Strange things are happening from one end of the railway to the other. Residents of both Stevenville and Chappellton are reporting folks behaving oddly.
Reports out of Chappellton say that there has been an increased demand for coffee. Lineups outside of Tommy Drive Thru have been at record highs!
Some folks are so eager to get coffee that they try to cut the line by entering the drive thru in the wrong direction. This might be one reason why the line is not moving very fast.
Tom, the owner of the drive thru, says business has never been better. “I hope it keeps up this way. I am planning an extension to the building and am considering an expanded menu, possibly to include donuts and sandwiches, and this will really help. I was the first to come up with the drive thru idea and donuts will be another first. Some people think I’m crazy, and they are probably right, but I think it’s an idea that will make money!”
Meanwhile, in Stevenville, reports of dangerous driving run rampant. Apparently the first report popped up a couple weeks ago but there is no photographic evidence.
Fast Eddie actually managed to knock over a fire hydrant in front of the Loew’s Theater. Thank goodness the matinee had just started and the line had cleared up. Who knows how many lives were saved due to good timing
This incident did bring one important point to the forefront though. It appears there is no water pressure in the main water line. This may be the subject of a future report.
Mr. S. Melli Coal must have decided he needed to get off the bridge in a hurry. Maybe he thought he could take a shortcut to Banjo Bob’s? We’ve heard Bob’s beans are the best for miles but they can’t be that good! All we know is that Mr. Coal certainly helps keep the natural gas plant in operation.
Th bridge wall suffered only minor damage. Local maintenance crews should have the damage repaired within a few days. Traffic on the bridge will be reduced to one lane until then.
Just before press time another report of a driver hitting a fire hydrant came to our attention. Poor old U. N. Moase, well known for his poor eyesight, swerved to avoid a mattress that fell off of a delivery truck and hit the fire hydrant in front of Banjo Bob’s. Apparently it was one of the finest mattresses from U & M Mattresses. A good thing for Uie since it provided a bit of cushioning to slow down his car. He barely touched the hydrant causing only minimal damage to his car and the hydrant.
Rumours abound that employees of the BS&T railroad are somehow influencing residents of these normally calm communities. Local authorities are investigating but will not reveal the extent of their investigation to this point. They want to assure the public that whoever, or whatever, is responsible for this rash of odd behaviour will be identified soon.
Rest assured that this reporter will continue to follow-up on this story and will report any future developments in this case.